


washing machine heart

by totallynotaghost



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Canon Asexual Character, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Screenplay/Script Format, Spoilers for The Magnus Archives Season 5, boys being soft with just a whiff of background horror, jon in a skirt emotionally sustains me, kissing? in a script fic? it's more likely than you'd think, mild referenced canon-typical violence, mostly comfort and little hurt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:33:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25057762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totallynotaghost/pseuds/totallynotaghost
Summary: “Not worth risking you stumbling into the arms of some vengeful Avatar of This-Week's-Flavour-Of-Doom-And-Gloom over a bit of flappy wool.”The remade world provides.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Comments: 12
Kudos: 122





	washing machine heart

**Author's Note:**

> working title was “washing machine,” but then “Washing Machine Heart” by Mitski popped into my recs and i merged with the loam. title borrowed as such.
> 
> **CW:** mild canon-typical violence, referenced only; eyes/feeling watched

[INT. SOMEWHERE IN THE UK, A RUN-DOWN CHARITY SHOP.]

[TAPE CLICKS ON.]

[LIGHT FOOTSTEPS TAP AGAINST SOFT WOOD. THE BACKGROUND IS OSTENSIBLY SILENT, ABSENT OF THE PERPETUAL MURMUR OF OVERLAPPING GROANS AND ECHOING SHRIEKS.]

**MARTIN**

This one is quite nice, yeah?

[SHARP SNAP OF CLOTHING.]

**ARCHIVIST**

Yes.

****

**MARTIN**

Really.

**ARCHIVIST**

...No. I-It’s just, just the pattern, really. The colour is...nice, though. It’s nice.

[MARTIN SCOFFS.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

Really. I do like the colour, quite a lot to be fair. I-it’s just, the patterning itself is. You know. Too -

****

**MARTIN**

Non-GMO? Pre-calamity? Free range -

****

**ARCHIVIST**

\- refractive. Um, s,sort of a Moraea villosa species of flora. _(brief pause, sigh)_ The embroidery resembles eyes, Martin.

****

**MARTIN**

Oh. _Oh._

[THE RUSTLING PICKS UP AGAIN, MORE VIGOROUSLY.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

I’ll just...put that back, then. Under the pile. _Well_ under the pile. _(strained cheeriness)_ Bit too big for you, anyway. A cardigan that long would just trip you up. Not worth risking you stumbling into the arms of some vengeful Avatar of This-Week's-Flavour-Of-Doom-And-Gloom over a bit of flappy wool.

[THE RUSTLING STOPS. A WEIGHTY VOID OF SOUND DAMPENS THE BACK-AND-FORTH SHUFFLING OF MOVEMENT.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

Jon? _(beat)_ Jon.

**ARCHIVIST**

I’m, I’m here.

****

**MARTIN**

Alright.

**ARCHIVIST**

_(quieter, almost inaudible)_ Sorry.

****

**MARTIN**

Alright.

[MARTIN’S SHORT EXHALE ECHOS THINLY IN THE VERY QUIET SHOP.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

You said that this place, this shop is...between? Between the, uh, the Entities' _realms_?

**ARCHIVIST**

Yes. I believe so, anyway. It’s - _(searchingly)_ eerie. I,I can still hear, still **_See_** outside. Of course, I don’t think it is possible for me to not **_Witness_** it all. Not anymore. But it’s...muted. Sort of. Not i,i,in a good way.

[THE ARCHIVIST INHALES.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

If anything, i,it feels...worse. _(bracing)_ Similar to the blindfold. Remember? W-when the Eye grew bored of that particular, uh, _rebellion_?

There’s so much pressure here, like adding extreme photosensitivity to an already audio sensitive migraine. And I, uh, have to sift through the...frequencies? Wavelengths. Pick them apart m,more carefully. Tune in, so they don’t, don’t snag and just...consume everything. Consume me.

 _(pause, strained)_ It is difficult.

****

**MARTIN**

Alright. Alright.

[THE SHIFTING OF FABRIC AS SOMEONE, PRESUMABLY MARTIN, WALKS A FEW PACES. MORE SHIFTING.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

Okay?

**ARCHIVIST**

_(muffled)_ Okay.

[SILENCE, THEN CLOTHING BRUSHING AGAIN. THE TAPPING OF FINGERTIPS AGAINST A COUNTER OR TABLE, FOLLOWED BY THE SLIDE OF LOOSE FABRIC.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

Um, _(coughs)_ maybe this one? _(clearer)_ It’s...I’ll still need some socks a,and trousers, if we really want to replace - 

****

**MARTIN**

Oh, we definitely do.

**ARCHIVIST**

_(audibly smiling)_ \- all of the clothes damaged by the, uh, caustic ooze. Slime?

****

**MARTIN**

_(teasingly)_ Mucus? Acrid gloop. _Secretion_ -

**ARCHIVIST**

_Ugh_ , please stop.

[PERVASIVE QUIET QUICKLY ENGULFS THE AIRY LAUGHTER.]

[THE ARCHIVIST EXHALES SLOWLY. FABRIC RUSTLES: POSSIBLY THE ITEM HELD IN HIS HANDS; POSSIBLY REACHING TOWARDS MARTIN; PROBABLY BOTH.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

It’s suitable. I'll try it on. There i,is a fitting room, off the side. It's...it’s a bit _Distorted_ , but. Not too much. Not here.

[FOOTSTEPS BEGIN TO PACE AWAY.]

****

**MARTIN**

Um. _(hesitantly)_ Should I...?

**ARCHIVIST**

Oh. No, no. No. It's...fine. I'll just...yes. Yes. Back in a moment. Wait, here? Please?

****

**MARTIN**

Right. I'll dig up a less ocular pair of trousers then, eh?

**ARCHIVIST**

_(softly)_ Yes. Yes, alright.

[A CLANKING THUMP AS SOMETHING DROPS TO THE FLOOR, POSSIBLY A BAG. FOOTSTEPS FADE. QUIET BLANKETS THE SPACE LEFT BEHIND.]

****

**MARTIN**

Hm. Maybe plaid? A proper goth set of trousers. _(chuckling)_ Plaid is probably the least spherical structure in existence.

[FABRIC RUSTLES, MORE DETERMINEDLY NOW. THE SHOP IS OTHERWISE SILENT.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

Has Jon ever worn plaid? I don't think....does he even like it? He...wait, yes. He wore that flannel. Daisy's ratty button up, at the cottage. Wore it near every day, certainly for a while. I think he probably... _(heh)_ I think it comforted him.

[A DISTANT WHISTLE OF WIND, THIN AND QUICKLY BREAKING AGAINST THE THICK SILENCE.]

****

**MARTIN _(CONT’D)_**

_(murmuring)_ Comfort, huh.

**ARCHIVIST**

_(distantly)_ Martin? Martin, the uh, _(closer)_ the zipper jammed. Could you -

[A PAUSE. SILENCE.]

**MARTIN**

Oh.

**ARCHIVIST**

Ah. Yes, well. This was bunched up o,on the, uh, the floor. In the fitting room. Thought I’d try it out with the jumper.

[FOOTSTEPS RESUME. SOMEONE SMOOTHES THEIR HANDS ACROSS A LONG LENGTH OF FABRIC.]

**MARTIN**

Lovely, Jon.

**ARCHIVIST**

Ah.

****

**MARTIN**

You’re beautiful.

**ARCHIVIST**

_(scoffs)_ I am rather filthy, actually. We both are. And i,it’s not like you’ve not seen me in a skirt before. Pretty sure I wore one, what, my first day as Head Archivist?

****

**MARTIN**

Hm.

**ARCHIVIST**

_(fondly)_ If you’re quite done petting me.

****

**MARTIN**

Don’t suppose you found socks balled up in there, too?

**ARCHIVIST**

No. But that’s alright. We can - 

****

**MARTIN**

_(interjecting)_ Can I kiss you?

**ARCHIVIST**

\- _what?_ Of course. Of course you may. But - _mmnh._

[SILENCE BALANCES ON A PIN’S HEAD, PUNCTURED BY THE OCCASIONAL BRUSH OF RIPPLING FABRICS. SOMEONE SIGHS.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

_(whisper soft)_ Alright?

****

**MARTIN**

Yes. _(pause)_ You seem pleased. Happy. It’s a really nice look.

**ARCHIVIST**

Not too, hm, _hazardous_ then? The skirt, that is.

****

**MARTIN**

Oh, probably. It is a tad long on you. _(brightly)_ But if anyone snags or steps on your skirt, we’ll smite them. You’ll. You, will smite them.

**ARCHIVIST**

Will I.

[SLIDING AND RATTLING OF A BAG, LIFTED FROM THE GROUND ONCE MORE.]

****

**ARCHIVIST _(CONT’D)_**

Guess we’ll find out.

[TAPE CLICKS OFF.]

**Author's Note:**

> me, on season four and going feral spoilering myself by watching season five animatics: i’m in hell


End file.
